3 Year Anniversary

Yesterday was our 3 year dating anniversary! It was a very chaotic day for both of us. I had to travel to Fayetteville for work and Nick had a job interview from 9:45 until 2. My day did not get off to a great start. The fog was very thick at 6:45 when I left my house so I could hardly see and with battling with my GPS, trying to use windshield wipers and defrost to see, and trying not to crash the State car, I was not positive the day would turn out as planned. After figuring out I was going the wrong way, North instead of South, I was anxious to get to Fayetteville on time. It's amazing to me how a GPS tells you to turn the wrong way when it's suppose to direct you to your destination. I think our GPS frequently does that because it really often loses signal. Moving on to when my day got better - Nick and I met up at Firebirds in North Hills for dinner to celebrate our anniversary! We were both dressed up and relieved and excited to see each other. My day was crazy and not how I had planned the day to go and Nick was relieved to have the interview behind him so when we finally saw each other (1.5 hours after we planned on meeting up) we were excited. Dinner was good. We used a gift card we received as a wedding present. In 3 years of being together I must say I have learned a lot - a lot about life, a lot about myself and about Nick, and a lot about relationships. Here's just a few things I've learned in the last 3 years. 1) Never go to bed angry! This has been a hard lesson for us to learn and we still have not mastered it. When I go to bed angry I always have a bad dream and it usually involves us breaking up or him cheating on me. Needless to say gong to bed angry makes for a very bad morning. After a bad dream like that, I wake up feeling even more angry than the night before. Anger can grow over time if the conflict is not resolved. That brings me to my next lesson. 2) It's important to learn how to settle arguments. Nick likes to retreat and take a breather when he's angry or frustrated. Me on the other hand wants attention to be drawn to the conflict right away. I don't want to retreat, I want to talk it out right then. If I'm upset, frustrated, sad, or angry I want to talk it out and very quickly reach a compromise and feel better. If someone hurts my feelings, I want to be over it really quickly so I want the person that hurt me to apologize right away so I can feel better. Everyone has their own way of resolving conflict. For me it's important that we reach a compromise or agree to disagree. I also need to hear "I'm sorry." 3) It's important to learn your partner's love language. Nick and I both love to receive quality time. At this point with no kids it's easy to make time for one another. We have date nights where we watch a redbox movie, play board games, or go out to eat. We like cooking together and watching movies. I also need to hear words of affirmation to know that I am loved. This can be hard for Nick since it's not natural for a guy to express his feelings. We are really good at telling each other that we appreciate each other and we very often say "I love you." To make it easier on Nick, almost every night before we go to sleep I ask "what was your favorite thing about today?" I ask because usually the answer makes me feel good and it lets me know whether or not he's satisfied with the quality time for the day or if we didn't get to spend any time together. 4) Communication is learned. I thought I knew how to communicate before we got married but now I'm starting to think I had no clue! Looking back now it's kinda funny but when we first got married there were many times our lack of communication was obvious! One day we left the apartment to go see a couch from off Craiglist. We had taken money out of the bank to buy the couch but when we got about 5 miles away, I asked, "did you bring the money?" And Nick answered, "no I thought you grabbed it." I hadn't grabbed the money and I hadn't asked him to bring it. It really made me laugh that neither one of us thought to ask the other about the money until after we left. We are becoming better communicators. I'm learning to never assume that something is a given or of course he would think of that because I would. No, Nick does not think like me and I shouldn't expect him to. And my last lesson to you is pray together. Nick and I were really good about praying together when we first started dating but as time went on and we got busy and more comfortable in our relationship, praying together became less of a priority. I'm ashamed to say that but it's the truth. Since we've been married prayer is a bigger priority for us. We try really hard to do our devotional together and pray together before bed. It doesn't always happen, but we try. The biggest thing is not forgetting and not letting excuses, like I'm too tired, get in the way. Simply by praying together you are brought closer together. Prayer also makes it easier for me to trust God.

I am extremely thankful that God brought us together 3 years ago!

Labor of Love

Yesterday was my first day of my new babysitting job. It went really well! The kids are super sweet and very cute! I was really impressed by their behavior and how well they played together. I'm hoping yesterday was a true representation of how they are and not a false first impression. I am thrilled to have extra money coming in! The money will allow us to buy Christmas presents this year and not feel guilty about it because Nick may or may not have a job lined up by then. And yesterday I had my birth control prescription transferred to Kerr Drug so I now have a $25 gift card for transferring it. I love getting free gift cards! And they have this cool reward program where after you get a prescription filled 10 times you get a free $10 gift card! I imagine I can find a gift or two for Nick for Christmas and use my gift card.

This weekend we worked in our yard for about 3 hours. Nick cut down 3 trees - one in our backyard and two in our side yard. We are slowly making progress in our yard and hopefully one day it will look ten times better than when we moved in. We have found some pretty random stuff in our yard. We have found - pieces of glass, bottle caps, 3 baseballs, broken pieces of toys, a propane tank, an umbrella stand, a basketball goal, a tire, a rusty kick stand off a bike, a silver fork, and I'm sure the list will continue as we continue to work in the yard. My favorite find was the tire and rusty kick stand. It's kind of funny finding stuff that was left behind, however it really proves to us that the previous owners did not take care of their yard, especially the backyard. Just reading that list above, you'd think we live in a trailer park but we don't.

That's all for now! - Mrs. T

Saving for the Future

Our electric bill is $20 less than last month! woohoo!!! I guess not having our AC on upstairs for 3 days and changing out some light bulbs for CFL ones saved us a few bucks! Even though it's only $20, I see it as God's way of looking out for us. We love our house and we don't want to move. We did some major cosmetic improvements inside and now we are trying to improve our yard so with all the time, sweat, and tears that we have put into making our house look better, I don't want to move. Nick has applied for 25 jobs so far. I am so proud of him for getting a jump start on the job hunt. We are really hopeful. Out of the two of us, I am the more positive one, I think Nick will have a job lined up before Thanksgiving, while Nick tends to think in terms of worse case scenario. We are really mindful of our financial situation and what it could be if Nick spends any time being unemployed. The secret behind saving money is making smart choices. We take our lunch to work every day, we don't go out to eat or to the movies, and we don't buy anything we don't need. We enjoy date nights at home with redbox rentals and $4 frozen pizza from Wal-Mart. Last Saturday and Sunday we spent the afternoon working in our backyard and then playing board games. We played Uno and Battleship. We are competitive when we play against each other so it's really fun! I share all this with you to point out that you don't have to spend a lot of money in order to enjoy life. To me saving money is fun! We could go to the movies and spend maybe $7 on gas to get there, $14 on tickets, and $12 on popcorn and drinks, but while we might enjoy the movie, we would spend $32. It's way more appealing to me to spend $2 on gas to drive to redbox, $1.11 on the movie, and $4 on pizza made in our oven, a grand total of $7.11. We also enjoy playing Wii games together. I kick Nick's butt when we play darts and bowling. I grew up watching my parents live pay check to pay check and it always made me sad. I'm hoping that by us saving money and pinching pennies now that our children will not have to see us struggle financially. I want to be able to afford annually family vacations and pay for college tuition without going in debit.

The Shock of A Lifetime

We were just starting to love owning our home and then we found out that Nick will be losing his job as early as December 31st. This was a major shock to us and to everyone that works there. In the weeks that led up to that announcement, we had received very promising news that Nick could see a 5% raise in his annaul salary. So we were all excited about that possibilty and what we could use the extra money on each month. We also were begining to really enjoy our house and the fact that we had everything we needed and could finally go on date nights and not worry about having to save money. We were really looking forward to those date nights. But now, we are trying our best to deal with the shock and emotions that this news brings. Thankfully, I have my job and we are childless and not pregnant. I would be a complete emotional mess right now if I didn't have my job or if we had a baby on the way. I am grateful for the little things that we have, like, the fact that Nick's parents gave us a garden hose, rake, and CFL lght bulbs. Yesterday I changed out some light bulbs in our house and I am amazed when I think about how God had his parents give those to us and now they will help us save money on our electric bill. The box says it saves 10 cents a month and $37 over the lifetime of each bulb. I am also thankful for all the extra household necessities that we have laying around. We have 2 extra boxes of tissue, 3 extra boxes of dryer sheets, 14 paper towel rolls, 35light bulbs, and 2 unopened boxes of trash bags. My family gave us all those items to us at no cost to us and we will save money by not having to buy those items any time soon. That only relieves some stress. I am so thankful. God provided us with lots of extras knowing that Nick's job situation was going to happen and that we would begin to feel the stress of having to save money. We also have a gift card to Firebirds that we received as a wedding gift. We have not used it yet because there's only 2 locations in this area and they are both far from where we live. We plan to use the gift card on our 6 month wedding anniversary so we can celebrate without feeling guilty about spending money. It's hard to believe that next month we'll have been married for 6 months! We know that God has a plan for us that is better than we can imagine or understand right now. We are trusting that God will lead Nick to a job that he will love and that it will be local. I am praying really hard that if we are not meant to stay in this area and live in our dream house that God will close doors here and will make me content with the idea of moving. At this point I find it hard to believe that God would lead us to our house only to have us move. Thank you for praying for us. Please pray for Nick's fellow employees as well, some are single parents, some have babies on the way, some are single, some are living pay check to pay check, and some are the sole providers for their families. We will keep you posted on Nick's job situation.

Blessed

I will say it again & again, we are blessed! I say it a lot because it's true. I had an emotional moment during church on Sunday. I started realizing how much has gone on during the last 6 months. First we bought a used car in January, my first car that is truly mine, well, ours'. Then in March we got married and then in April we started looking at houses. On our first month anniversary we were in Nags Head for our Best Man's wedding and then on our second month anniversary we were signing our loan application for our house and then on our third month anniversary we woke up for the first time in our house. A lot has happened in my life during the last 6 months and I have enjoyed every minute of it! We had our house warming party on Saturday. It went really well. There were so many people in our house, I didn't think we had that many people in our lives that cared about us enough to come to our house. It really meant a lot to us that people drove 20 - 80 miles to see our house and celebrate with us. Throughout the whole searching and buying process of getting our house God was in control and undoubtably with us every step of the way. It amazes me and I'm so thankful that God gave us an unsettling feeling about the first house we were under contract with. We had a lot of restless nights and every time I even thought about buying stuff for that house, I would get nervous and feel uneasy about how expensive living in that house was going to be. Once we decided that we didn't want to proceed in buying that house we were not sure we could move on because we were under contract, a legal bounding document. It was only through God's power that we were able to get out of that contract. It was then that we really started counting our blessings. Our realtor even thought it was impossible to get out of it, but God made it happen. I have always believed Romans 8:28 and it's often been my comfort verse and I'm happy when things happen that prove to non-Christians that the verse is true and God is good, not evil. On Sunday I was emotional because I started reflecting on everything God has done in my life - changing my heart to love Nick and not just as a friend. He wrote an awesome love story for me, giving me a job, blessing me with parents that love my husband and have always been supportive and love me unconditionally, giving me a house that is way beyond what I ever dreamt of for myself, and I have never been without anything I ever needed. Don't get me wrong, there have been struggles along the way, however God has blessed me and given to me beyond measure, more than I could hope for or dream of.

Our Money Saving Tips

I love saving money! Last night I had my birth control prescription transferred to Kroger so I could get $25 added to my Kroger plus card! I bought 5 bags of groceries with that $25 and my only out of pocket expense was $2.72 and $10 for the prescription. We also use coupons at the grocery store. We typical have coupons for things that we use or eat frequently like, Pop Tarts, chips, toothpaste, toilet paper, and our favorite desserts! Growing up my mom was crowned "Coupon Queen" by my brother and I so needless to say, I learned the value of saving money through coupons. My dad is a big fan and advocate for only buying groceries from stores that triple your coupons and for that reason he has gotten tons of free grocery items. It has recently been on my mind lately to share everyone the way we save money because I think, I may be wrong, but I think we're 1 of very few young couples that are fanatics about saving money.

Tip #1 - Your electric bill. We always turn off lights as soon as we're done using them, even if we know we're going to return to the room in a few minutes. We have also turned our refrigerator and freezer down to the medium, recommended setting. Lots of people don't know that just by simply lowering these temperatures, you can save a few dollars a month. We only use cold water to wash clothes. The average cold water load of laundry costs 1.5 cents while the average hot water load costs 38 cents. We have two thermostats and we have them set for different temperatures. We have the upstairs set at 73 and downstairs set at 74. For most people that is too hot, but since our house has mostly hardwood floors and ceiling fans in every room, we are able to stay cool. Just by running ceiling fans, you can lower the temperature in your house by 2 degrees. We also have thermal curtains in our bedroom and dark curtains in our guest bedroom since those are the rooms that let in the most light that saves us 10% off our electric bill. We unplug appliances when we're not using them like our toaster and George Forman grill. And we never leave our computers or labtops plugged in or left on if we're not using them.

Tip #2 - Coupons! You can find coupons online, in the newspaper, and in the mail. I recently discovered that Moe's and Red Robin have an eClub that sends you a coupon for free stuff on your birthday. I know this is only 1 day out of the year, but if you like to eat out this would be a good deal for you. We typically save $10-$15 every time we go grocery shopping. Even if you have to buy a newspaper for $1 to get these coupons, it's worth it for the amount you'll save. We also look for online surveys that offer deals like, some fast food places will give you something free or $1 off for completing their online survey. For example, Chick-fila's survey gives you a free sandwich! It take 5 minutes and you save money for the next time you go there. And pay attention to radio and TV ads, sometimes advertisements will say "come get 10% off now until Saturday" and that's the only way they advertise those deals, not through coupons. And most places accepted their competitors coupons. AC Moore, Jo Ann Fabrics, and Michaels all accept each other's coupons.

Tip #3 - Buy off Craiglist! Almost everything in our house was bought off Craiglist. Here's what we bought - a matching coffee table & end table, dining room table, chairs, & matching hutch, 2 couches, an entertainment center, our bedroom set - headbaord, footboard, 2 nightstands, dresser with mirror, and armoire, 2 light fixtures, patio set with umbrella, a free standing mirror, a vanity stool, 2 matching bar stools, and 2 pieces of art. Buying all this stuff new would have cost us at least $5,000. By buying all of it off of Craiglist we would able to pay less than half of that, we saved a ton of money!

Tip #4 - Don't be afraid to negotiate. We bought our dining room rug new, but we didn't pay full price. We saw the price and we weren't willing to pay it so we asked the sales guy, "is that the best price you can give us?" and he took off about $25. The worse someone can say is no. I'm not suggesting that you go into Wal-Mart and start negotiating, but when it comes to furniture stores, auto repair shops, mattress stores, and individual sellers, always negotiate. We saved $250 off our mattress set because we negotiated. We also got a sweet deal on our monthly cable! We now pay $30 less every month, that's $360 for the year! Don't be afraid to call your cable company and ask for a better deal.

Tip #5 - Buy in bulk when items are on sale. For items that we use all the time like, toothpaste, toilet paper, paper towels, and soap, when I find it on sale, I buy more than one so I won't have to buy it as often and I can save money.

Tip #6 - Go to the grocery store less often. We buy groceries every 2 weeks. We save money on gas, time, and taxes by only going every 2 weeks. We spend about $94-$120 every grocery trip. Most people, depending on the size of their family, will spend about $100 every week. By going every 2 weeks and spending about $120, that's only $60 a week. And never go to the grocery store when you're tired or hungry! When you're tired or hungry you will buy more food and items you don't need without even realizing it!

Tip #7 - We hardly ever go out to lunch during the work week. I see lots of people going out to lunch or having their daily Starbucks and it always amazes me because I view that as a waste of money. You figure the typical lunch is $5-$7 and if you go out to lunch everyday that's $25-$35 every week. Even if you only go out 2 days a week, that's $10-$14 every week. And I'm way underestimating the costs here. By taking our lunch to work everyday, we're saving $40-$140 a month!

Tip #8 - Use cruise control, even on short trips in town. My car and Nick's truck are not the best on gas mileage, but by using cruise control even when we drive to work, I bet we are making our gas last an extra 20 miles. Nick's truck now gets 20 miles to the gallon, when it use to get 17 miles.

Tip #9 - Vacation. Before you even leave to go on vacation, decide how much you're going to spend. If you decide on $200, take $200 cash and only spend that amount. A lot of extra spending is caused convenient access & unconscious use of debit and credit cards so by deciding on an amount before you leave and only taking cash & a credit or debit card for emergencies, you will save money. And of course, shop around for best deal on hotels, rental cars, and airline flights. And find coupons in brochures for restaurants, amusement parks, and other attractions while you're there.

And lastly, I'll leave you with what I would say are obvious money saving tips -

only run the dishwasher when it's full
turn off the water when you're brushing your teeth
use the microwave instead of the stove to save energy
shop around & compare prices for big ticket items
save boxes, gift bags, and tissue paper & re-use it
go to the dollar store & stock up on cards - birthdays, get well cards, etc.
bank shop for the highest checking and saving interest rates
at a restaurant, split an entree with someone & order water
buy in season - school supplies and dorm decor are on sale so stock up on office supplies and home decor stuff while it's on sale

I hope by sharing all this with the world, at least 1 person will learn a new way to save money. Thanks for reading!

First Hosting Event at Our House

Last night we hosted our first event at our house! I hosted girls Bible study at our house. Overall I think it went well, minus hearing bats squeak in our chimney! It was kinda funny seeing their reactions when they first heard the bats and I laughed when someone said, "they're loud!" and my response was, "I told you guys they're loud, I wasn't kidding!" I really enjoyed seeing the girls make themselves comfortable in our home. Several people, at least 2 that I can remember, walked into our kitchen to throw their cups away and I immediately felt happy and thought, "I'm so glad they are making themselves at home!" You always hear people say, "oh just make yourself at home" but rarely do people do that so I thought that just by them walking over to the trash and to the sink in our kitchen that that was a good sign that our home is welcoming and comfortable. It's like you try to design and decorate your home in a way that will be warm and inviting, but you never really know if you've succeeded in doing that until you have people over and you see it for yourself. So needless to say, when everyone left our house last night I was happy that we have created a home that not only reflects our taste and preferences, but also is inviting and comfortable for our friends. I am super excited about Saturday's house warming party! We are expecting about 20-25 people to come over. I am anxious to see how our parents are going to interact with each other. I'm sure Nick's dad will get jealous and feel ignored because whenever my dad is around, Nick and him talk a lot. I'm extremely happy that my husband can be himself around my parents and not feel judged, that is not the case with his own parents. However I think sometimes his parents pick up on that and it makes them jealous. I don't blame them for being jealous, Nick is a love-able guy that's why I married him! I hope Saturday goes well, we're planning on having some background music so that no one can hear the bats and there won't be any awkward moments of silence since not everyone knows each other.

That's all for now folks! Y'all come back now, ya hear??!